Thursday, July 16, 2009

Caring for Elderly Parents!

If it seems like I have been a little quiet around here lately....

I have reached that part of the climb on the mountain of life where I am having to care or at least check on my parents on a regular basis. My parents will be 70 next year and I am the oldest of eight children in my family. I am also one of the closest siblings. I have a 35 yo sister and a 22 yo handicap brother that still live at home, however, my sister actually cares about herself, her romance novels, and her soap operas than she does in making sure that my parents have a meal on the table. My other siblings either live out of state, or are too busy with their own affairs to be of much help! So that leaves me!

Over the 4th of July weekend, my hubby, kids and I went over to my parents' house to help them get some landscaping and other outside chores done around the house as the weeds and moss had pretty much taken over their flower beds and yard.

My family has been going over there on a regular basis since the beginning of July to finish up the outside work.

On top of the outside work, we have had to help them realize that one of their bank accounts was getting scammed!! So far they have lost $500 over the last 5 months!!! They have been able to get some of that money back but they will not get all of it back due to the statue of limitations.

We have had to deal with my mom being in the emergency THREE times in the last 2 weeks! The third time was due to her not being able to handle the pain well from being bruised up. She actually told the ER docs that she had fallen again when in reality/according to my dad, she hadn't fallen again! My mom is suffering from dementia! The docs have ruled out alzheimers through tests but as far as I am concerned it might as well be alzheimers!!

My dad has problems with dyscalculia so him working with bank accts. and finances is quite difficult for him! So right now they have all their bills automatically withdrawn from their accts. and their SS and pensions automatically deposited. This is the best route right now as my mom and dad are pack rats!! They get their mail and bill statements and literally have it dumped on a dining room table. I was helping them one day work through some of the paper debris and found bill statements from over 5 years ago in the piles!!! Down in their basement they have boxes of papers that they moved with them to their current house from the old house...the move was over 25 years ago!!!

Needless to say, I am just overwhelmed so I am scaling back my blogging efforts to a few posts each week!!! I need to work at getting my parents' affairs in order so that life can be running smoothly over there and here!


Anonymous said...

I am sorry you are going through that. When my mom was sick it took my one sister months to realize that my mom needed more care than I could give her at my home (I don't work so every doctor appointment and keeping her at my house was my sisters solution) When she finally had to go into a nursing home because she needed help moving and such all 3 daughters did help but it is very hard on everyone. Hugs to you. Cheryl

theresa said...

I sure do empathize! I currently have my 88 & 89 year old grandparents staying with us while grandma recuperates from a 9-day hospital stay. And honestly, it's way easier now then it will be when they go back to their apartment and I'm taking them dinners, etc.