Thursday, October 9, 2008

Parenting Series--ABCs Christian Parenting--Part 3

Did you do any building or affirming this week with your child? In my parenting series, I am taking the time to work thru the alphabet--sharing the letter and some thoughts on parenting. This week we take the time to think about "C" and Communication!

COMMUNICATE with your child in a way that glorifies Christ, always asking "would I say this to a friend?"

Pretend with me that "the friend" is Jesus! Would you be more of a Martha or Mary? Would you find that it was more important to sit and listen OR to stand and work in a different room?

Would you say things like "dumb"; "stupid"; "lazy" or "you just won't amount to anything!" to Jesus? Those kinds of words to your child can be hurtful to their self-esteem and can stay with them for the rest of their lives.

Would you tell them that you don't have time to listen carefully and politely to what they are saying?

Children thrive on positive attention. They want to feel loved and appreciated and as a parent you are the best person for giving them that loving attention and appreciation!

Take the time to listen to your child.

Take the time to give your child the attention they crave on a daily basis.

If you get angry over something your child has done take the time to walk away from the situation to calm down. Then approach your child calmly and talk to them about the situation. It does nothing for you and your child's relationship if you are constantly yelling every bit of communication to them. (This is something that I struggle with daily!)

Communicate in love rather than anger by saying words like "Please", "Thank you", "I love you!" "You did great!", "You are beautiful", You are handsome!" "I'm pleased with you doing _____!" can go a long way with your relationship with your child. Showing your love thru hugs, time, and one-on-one attention also helps build your communication relationship with your child.
Take time this week to communicate with your child. Let them know they are appreciated, loved, and worthy of your time.

"Let every detail in your lives—words, actions, whatever—be done in the name of the Master, Jesus, thanking God the Father every step of the way." (Colossians 3:17 The Message)

"If anyone speaks, he should do it as one speaking the very words of God. If anyone serves, he should do it with the strength God provides, so that in all things God may be praised through Jesus Christ." (1Peter 4:11-NIV)

One final note:

If a child lives with criticism, he learns to condemn.
If a child lives with hostility, he learns to fight.
If a child lives with ridicule, he learns to be shy.
If a child lives with fear, he learns to be apprehensive.
If a child lives with shame, he learns to feel guilty.
If a child lives with tolerance, he learns to be patient.
If a child lives with encouragement he learns to be confident.
If a child lives with acceptance, he learns to love.
If a child lives with recognition, he learns it is good to have a goal.
If a child lives with honesty he learns what truth is.
If a child lives with fairness, he learns justice.
If a child lives with security, he learns to have faith in himself and those about him.
If a child lives with friendliness, he learns the world is a nice place in which to live to love and be loved. (Anonymous)

1 comment:

Kate said...

I just love that poem that you ended this post with. That is beautiful!

Eric and I always discuss the importance of treating our children with respect. We should model that behavior in our dealings with them if we expect to be treated the same way. So everything you had to say about communication really resonated with me. Thanks!